Historical setting: 602 C.E. A cottage in the Vosges
The novice here on stable duty this morning is Gabe. That was probably a kindness by the brother who assigns duties to the novices. I can see Gabe is well and finding his spiritual nurture in this place. He tells me he has a better appreciation for his preparation at home growing up because others around him are finding this transition much more difficult. Gabe also tells me he misses his brother and all of us, but he adds, missing your birth family is forbidden here.
He says, “The teacher here wants us to know one another as brothers. The reason, they say, is to give up our earthly ways for God’s sake, but really, I think these rules are made to heal our wounds of loss.
“I hear other boys weeping late into the night. I think they don’t find comfort in God always being with us, even here. I whispered to that poor fellow next to me and I told him not to worry because God is with us. God’s Spirit carries silent and invisible love, like a messenger dove, even for family far away. But for him, that was the worst thing to say. He thinks God is some kind angry, humanlike monster looking for excuses to punish boys for their tears. And it doesn’t help that the monks who rule here in the night tell us we should all ‘Fear God.’ because it makes us properly humble.”
I ask Gabe, “What does it say of the fear of God in Psalm 103?”
Gabe knows his psalms well, and he answers,
“As a father has compassion for his children,
So, the Lord has compassion for those who fear him.
For he knows how we were made:
He remembers that we are dust.”
“So, what do you think that psalm and all those like it are intending to say about fear of God?”
I can see him thinking through the psalms he remembers – even including Psalm 23 that he whispers as he considers fear, “for I will fear no evil…”
I intrude in his thought, “Fear of God comes with lots of human interpretations: punishment, dread, terror, awe, appreciation, relationship, faith.”
“Yes, Papa, that’s why it’s so confusing. Maybe when it is my turn to copy scriptures, I will use more words of awe and less of fear.”
“Oh, that it was so easy to just reword the human spirit.”
(Continues Tuesday, July 25)
Lazarus Ink 